October - Run Don't Walk to Kindness
By Samantha Ruckman
Girls on the Run is a twice-weekly, non-profit, after-school program that teaches girls to develop empathy, self-esteem, and kindness, while moving toward the goal of running a 5k race. Over the course of three months, girls explore teamwork, friendship, compromise, and gratitude and, through the Community-Impact project, they learn how important it is to give back.
When I first started coaching for Girls on the Run (3rd-5th grade) and Girls on Track (7th-8th grade), I wasn’t sure what to expect. I knew that I loved running (most days) and I also knew that I loved working with children (most days). I wanted to give something back to the community. So there I was, bright new coach’s shirt, my trusty running shoes laced up, my huge bottle of water at the ready. Only to find that one of the girls hated running. I mean, really. hated. running.
Sure, some of the other girls disliked running for long periods of time, others weren’t thrilled about running in Arizona’s ridiculously-long, summer-like heat, but this girl? Mary* hated it all. She hated running, she sometimes hated us for asking her to try, but mostly she hated her parents for making her come to this “after-school running thing.”
“They just want me to lose weight,” she said. She looked sad, and scared, and really far away, and I wanted to hug her and tell her that it would all be okay. My mind raced through all of the clichés, all the phrases every single woman knows by heart: “You’re beautiful the way you are;” “Beauty is on the inside;” “You’re not fat.” Finally, I said “I’m not skinny and I run half marathons. For me, the stronger my body is, the better. Your body is yours. You get to decide what you want your body to be able to do.” She looked skeptical, but she didn’t say anything. The head coach worked with her. I worked with her. Our assistant coach worked with her. Nothing. She was determined not to enjoy herself.
Finally, one afternoon late in October, we managed to get Mary to talk about her weekend. She’d been on an amazing hike with her dad. Apparently, she loved to hike. So the next practice, we took the girls out on a trail close to the school. After practice, we could tell that Mary had run a bit more than normal. She seemed almost happy. The girls finished the season and I didn’t see Mary again until much later.
Two years later I was in the grocery store when a tall young woman came racing over to me and hugged me. “Coach Sam!” she said. I stepped back and looked at her. It was Mary. She was taller, more confident, and beaming. “You won’t believe this, Coach Sam, but I am on the cross-country team at the high-school and I’m good at it. I’m even trying to get a college scholarship for running. It’s all because of that trail run and because you told me that my body was mine.” And with another hug and a big smile, she was gone.
You never know which seemingly-small thing will resonate with someone, which things will change someone’s life.
When I first started coaching for Girls on the Run (3rd-5th grade) and Girls on Track (7th-8th grade), I wasn’t sure what to expect. I knew that I loved running (most days) and I also knew that I loved working with children (most days). I wanted to give something back to the community. So there I was, bright new coach’s shirt, my trusty running shoes laced up, my huge bottle of water at the ready. Only to find that one of the girls hated running. I mean, really. hated. running.
Sure, some of the other girls disliked running for long periods of time, others weren’t thrilled about running in Arizona’s ridiculously-long, summer-like heat, but this girl? Mary* hated it all. She hated running, she sometimes hated us for asking her to try, but mostly she hated her parents for making her come to this “after-school running thing.”
“They just want me to lose weight,” she said. She looked sad, and scared, and really far away, and I wanted to hug her and tell her that it would all be okay. My mind raced through all of the clichés, all the phrases every single woman knows by heart: “You’re beautiful the way you are;” “Beauty is on the inside;” “You’re not fat.” Finally, I said “I’m not skinny and I run half marathons. For me, the stronger my body is, the better. Your body is yours. You get to decide what you want your body to be able to do.” She looked skeptical, but she didn’t say anything. The head coach worked with her. I worked with her. Our assistant coach worked with her. Nothing. She was determined not to enjoy herself.
Finally, one afternoon late in October, we managed to get Mary to talk about her weekend. She’d been on an amazing hike with her dad. Apparently, she loved to hike. So the next practice, we took the girls out on a trail close to the school. After practice, we could tell that Mary had run a bit more than normal. She seemed almost happy. The girls finished the season and I didn’t see Mary again until much later.
Two years later I was in the grocery store when a tall young woman came racing over to me and hugged me. “Coach Sam!” she said. I stepped back and looked at her. It was Mary. She was taller, more confident, and beaming. “You won’t believe this, Coach Sam, but I am on the cross-country team at the high-school and I’m good at it. I’m even trying to get a college scholarship for running. It’s all because of that trail run and because you told me that my body was mine.” And with another hug and a big smile, she was gone.
You never know which seemingly-small thing will resonate with someone, which things will change someone’s life.
The Girls on the Run motto is:
We believe that every girl
Can embrace who she is,
Can define who she wants to be,
Can rise to any challenge,
Can change the world.
CAN.
YES! We can. We must. We will.
We believe that every girl
Can embrace who she is,
Can define who she wants to be,
Can rise to any challenge,
Can change the world.
CAN.
YES! We can. We must. We will.